Gaultier Vs. Dame Darcy

Posted 2 CommentsPosted in art, artsy fartsy, comedy, fashion, gay, Gothic, Uncategorized, women

  While wending my way home from Portland, I stopped into the De Young Museum in San Francisco to see the Gaultier exhibit that originated in Montreal last year.  JPG was a favorite designer of mine through my highschool and college years, and it’s neat to see so many of his couture pieces mounted as an art exhibition.

The show also features artists that JPG has worked with/for/collaborated with, including Herb Ritts, Andy Warhol, Pedro Almodovar, Pierre Cardin,  Madonna, Pierre et Gilles, Luc Besson, and others, both more famous and more obscure-

Creepily animated JPG introduces the exhibit- his face is projected on a white mannequin, and looks amazing!

Jean Paul Gaultier loves Leigh Bowery , and so do I.

Punkity punk punk!

The show also has a very wonderful coffee-table book with some amazing photographs and essays about Gaultier’s influences and collaborators that I recommend highly.

If you distill it all down, Gaultier’s design career has been made of:

1. Mermaids

2. Punks

3. S&M

4. Sailors

5. Dolls

6. Corsets

7. The Madonna

8. Madonna

At the exhibit, I was reminded of the obsessions of the amazingly multitalented illustrator/musician/dollmaker Dame Darcy:

1. Mermaids

2. Sailors

3. Witches

4. Horses

5. Dolls

6. Dark Fairies

7. Saints & Goddesses

8. The Madonna

9. Siamese Twins!

I think this sounds like a collaboration in the making-

Meat Cake #17 by Dame Darcy - front cover

At any rate, I heartily recommend them both!

Shine A Light! Friday, Oct 14th at Portland Art Museum!

Posted Posted in art, artsy fartsy, comedy, portland, Uncategorized

Once a year, the Portland Art Museum does an event called Shine A Light where dancers, performance artists, and other artists offer new ways of thinking about and interacting with art.   This year, they are adding comedians, including Danny Felts, Whitney Streed, Jen Allen, Jimmy Newstetter, and myself, Virginia Jones.  It costs the regular $15 admission, or it’s free for members (only fifty bucks a year to join!).

There will be haircuts offered, dances performed, and beers brewed inspired by works from the collection.  I will be leading a fictional art tour at 8, 9, and 10 on the third floor of the Jubitz center, focusing on the post-1960 modern art collection.

Postscript: I had a really wonderful time telling art jokes.  I am considering recording my jokes for a podcast that can be downloaded and used in a walk-through tour.  My friend CJ fell in love, and later got married and then divorced, and I got to talk with a reporter from the Oregonian who told me she would have loved to have quoted me in more jokes, but that most of my jokes had the f-bomb in them.  They totally do!

It’s Getting Kinda Crowded

Posted Posted in art, artsy fartsy, comedy, fashion, Gothic, portland, Uncategorized

Photo By Roger Circle23

This amazing photograph is by the amazing Roger at Circle23 Photography.  (Please note: big chunks of his website are NSFW.)

“Dammit, Virginia” said Virginia, “How many times do I have to tell you to keep your dirty whore shoes off the coffee table?  I work hard to keep this place nice, and I could use a little help”

“Well, Virginia”, said Virginia smugly, “It’s my table.  I paid for it, and I guess I’ll ruin it if I want to.”

Virginia, meanwhile, sat whimpering in the corner, rocking back and forth and crying to herself.  “You guys!” she screamed.  “WHAT ABOUT VIRGINIA?”

All eyes turned to the coffee table.  There, six inches from Virginia’s foot, Virginia’s body sprawled across the table, one hand clutching a shot glass.  Her breath had been clouding the glass surface for the last few minutes, but the shapes of her condensed breath had been shrinking and slivering away until now, when no breath appeared.  Her lips slowly began to turn blue.

“Wait- wasn’t Virginia supposed to be watching her?”  asked Virginia.  “Where is she, anyway?”

Virginia, her finger shaking, pointed through the window, out to the sunny balcony, where Virginia was finishing a glass of Champagne, oblivious to the state of her charge.

“Well,” said Virginia, closing her magazine, “Can I have her bedroom?”

Portrait by Andrea Coghlan

Posted Posted in art, comedy, Gothic

Listen, I know you like me, and I like you, and you wish we could be together all the time, but we can’t. This is a hard fact of life. You’ve got your job and your family, and sometimes I’m in telling jokes in a casino or a bar & grill. Enter the good people at the Coghlan mint: artist 2nd Coming made this picture of me, her favorite Portland stand-up, and has made it available for the general public.


Posted 1 CommentPosted in art, fashion, goth

It’s not every day you meet someone who is both beautiful and talented, but my lady A. Coghlan sent me a picture today inspired by A. Cooper that has knocked me out. I blush, I blush! A million thanks for this lovely pic. She is an illustrator that has been published in Gawker, The Indypendent, and has a lovely tee in the works on Threadless.