Adventures in Casinos- Spirit Mountain Edition!

I told a secret to a wolf at Spirit Mountain Casino.
Last night I did comedy with one of my favorite ladies, Susan Rice, at Spirit Mountain Casino in Grand Ronde. It was one of those shows where we performed to people who did not know they were being performed to, and who mostly just wanted to eat oversized desserts and then go put their money in plasma-screen slot machines. However, we soldiered on, had fun, and kept PG-13 rating.

I got up this morning to head home, using my food voucher to secure a soy latte for the road. It is never clearer that I am far from home than when I visit a casino coffee /I was sold a bagel, which was wearing a sticker proudly proclaiming that it was fresh on Tuesday. I decided not to eat it, but it functioned very well in the car as kind of a cinnamon-raisin air freshener. They do have soy milk- score!- but the barista asks if I have a food allergy, or if I “make a choice” not to drink milk. I explain to her that I am a total pain-in-the-ass vegan. People really seem to prefer when it’s not a moral stance. I also have a personalized coffee cup with all my favorite stuff on it that I got at Star*ucks, and carry from town to town like a security blanket- if you want the same one, you can download the art here, or use it as a template for your own amazing tumbler! As I handed it over, the very sincere barista asked if I would mind if she made my coffee in a paper cup, like regular, and then poured it into my travel cup. I pointed out to her sweetly, that really doesn’t save a tree, does it? And she said, oooooh. I guess not!

Nothing can prepare you for casino life. Wolf shirts are worn without irony. People smoke cigarettes INSIDE. You think you can take it? I’d like to see you try!

What I’ve Been Doing Lately

Last Wednesday, I took a trip to the beautiful reservation in Warm Springs, OR and the Kahneeta Casino and Resort. It was so quiet, and so beautiful. I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but it felt good to be out of the rain.

Susan Rice and I enjoyed playing the Appaloosa Lounge, where they were surprised that two women could both be funny.

Then was Headers, the bar that Dax Jordan and I performed at in Selma, OR on Saturday night. At Pop 1800, it doesn’t have a Taco Bell but it does have something called the Raw Claw, contents pictured below.

My favorite was a DVD called “Who’s The Bitch Now?” It serves as the town’s main gambling opportunity and adult bookstore. I got a tip jar, I got a shot at the Raw Claw, I got a lot of attention from a drunk cryptozoologist who claimed to be a former member of Arizona metal band a Surgical Steel. Good times.


What would you do if you opened up Astoria’s Coastal Weekend publication and this advertisement stared you in the face? Up to 30 people came down to watch two ladies doing comedy in the Pacific Northwest’s oldest standing masonic lodge.  Many thanks to the hilarious Susan Rice for showing me how it’s done.

No Questions, No Photos

I know some people have been asking when they can see me do comedy. Good news! I have been invited to do a half an hour of material featuring for one of my favorite chicks, the hilarious Susan Rice, on December 14th. The bad news is that it’s in Astoria, OR, at the Labor Temple, at 934 Duane St. I hope that Ron Bennington will be pleased I’m doing a gig where Goonies was filmed.
If you like comedy and live in Astoria, please come! Especially if you’re my hairdresser’s mom, the wonderful Kristi Bullock from Do! Rad Cuts And Color.
As long as I’m plugging, please vote for Susan in Ziddio’s Lucky 21 contest!

Postscript: Wednesday, Dec 5th (Next Week!) I will be doing 15 minutes at the Hungry Tiger Too at 9!

207 SE 12th Ave
Portland, OR 97214