comedytravel

Very Interesting, Mr. Bond

Here is a list of the most interesting questions I was asked in Hong Kong.

Q.  Do you want your orange juice hot or cold?

A.  Cold, please.  Thank you for asking.  “Hot Juice” would be a good name for a band, though.  No-one has ever asked me that question before.

Q.  Don’t you find that Hong Kong is just like New York?

A.  What?  Maybe if New York was 99% Chinese.  Do you know what the phrase “Melting Pot” means?  I saw a black dude yesterday and I thought I’d won some sort of a prize.  Hong Kong looks like New York probably will in 2025.
Q.  I saw your Facebook profile yesterday, and in one of the photos you looked very thin (indicating in the neck and face where I was looking more thin.)  Were you thinner when you were younger?

A. For one thing, thank you so much for asking.   Secondly, no, unfortunately I was born this size.  Like Athena springing from her father’s head full-grown, I exploded my mother.  I never got to meet her, but I did see her bloody shoes left on the floor.

Questions I have for Hong Kong:

Does a giant black skull make people want to buy high-end t-shirts?

Does every event really have to have a mascot?  Here’s the one for the Shanghai technology expo.

Can it…is it following me?