Emily Ryan and Her Trash Wig Party:

What’s that saying about lemons and lemonade? My New York sister turns dumpster wigs into a good time machine. I just wanted to post her flyer, and to remark that if Emily ever learns to play piano, Tori Amos had better watch her ass. Check out her money-saving blog here!

My Sisters on Good Morning, America

The camera loves my sisters, and they love to give me the business. I especially like how my mother gets cut off in the middle of her favorite phrase, “Listen to your mother!”

Sha-Zam!

I am proud to announce that my sister, a week after moving to Noo Yawk, has landed a gig as David Blaine’s P.A. She is on call 24 hours a day to pick up his magic pants and get his magic coffee. I was then in the position where I had to explain to my mother who David Blaine is. I went with: he’s a magician who doesn’t so much do tricks as he performs feats of putting up with extreme inconvenience, such as living in a fishbowl or starving above London in a glass box, or indeed living in New York City. And then she asked me a question that I can’t answer: “In what way does that make him a magician?”