AI Reviews: Virginia Jones

Dall-e image of comedian virginia jones
A beautiful image of me by Dall-E

I asked Google’s Bard AI to review Virginia Jones’ comedy, and this is what I got, which is more true than not-true:

Virginia Jones is a stand-up comedian who is known for her dark and absurdist humor. Her jokes often deal with topics such as death, religion, and mental illness. Jones’s comedy is not for everyone, but it is sure to get a reaction from those who appreciate her unique brand of humor.

In her latest album, “Gothic American,” Jones tackles a wide range of topics, from her own mental health struggles to the state of the world. The album is both funny and thought-provoking, and it is sure to leave a lasting impression on anyone who listens to it.

One of the things that makes Jones’s comedy so unique is her willingness to tackle taboo subjects. She is not afraid to talk about death, religion, and mental illness, and she does so with a refreshing honesty and humor. Jones’s comedy is not for everyone, but it is sure to get a reaction from those who appreciate her unique brand of humor.

Another thing that makes Jones’s comedy so special is her ability to connect with her audience. She has a natural charisma and a way of making her audience feel like they are part of the joke. Jones is a master of storytelling, and she weaves her jokes into personal anecdotes that make her material feel more relatable.

Overall, Virginia Jones is a talented comedian who is sure to please fans of dark and absurdist humor. Her latest album, “Gothic American,” is a must-listen for anyone who appreciates unique and thought-provoking comedy.

How To Do Stand Up Comedy

how to do standup a standup comedian at an open mic
This could be you, and it probably is

You’ve always wondered: How do I do standup comedy?

I can barely even leave the house anymore. There’s all these people lining up, demanding how to do I standup comedy. So I’m telling you now. for once and for all.

Step One: Comedy Preparation

Find a comedy open mic. i found my first open mic in the free weekly in the town that I lived in, the one that was full of missed romantic connections and rock show previews.

Open mic is spelled open mic. I think it should be open mike, because that is short for microphone, and mic is not short for microphone. I have lost this battle. It’s open mic.

Write down every funny bit you do, every story you tell, you know, everything that makes you funny. Try to edit these things down to their essence.

If you can, read your jokes to a friend and see if they can give you notes.

There are a lot of classes that teach you how to write standup comedy about your background and your family. I think they make everyone sound kind of the same. It’s never been what I like to do, personally.

Up top, do a joke introducing yourself. This can be as basic as “I’m a Mormon from Las Vegas, and nobody thinks I exist,” to, “I’m mostly carbon-based and fun at funerals.”

Most standup open mics are three minutes in big cities with big scenes, but they can be five in smaller scenes. It depends on how many comics usually show up. Prepare what you perceive to be three minutes. Practice it.

Read your little script several times. Memorize it, even. You’re going to get better at memorizing things in the future, so start working on it now.

Step Two: The First Set As A Standup Comic

Show up at the open mic, a little early. See what the other comics are doing. Are they writing their names on a notepad? Putting little slips of paper in a bucket? Do what they do.

Watch other comics. When you’re new, you’ll learn a lot about what to do, and what not to do, by watching other people do standup.

Look for the light. Someone, usually the host, will raise a phone to indicate that your time is about up. Wrap it up, it’s usually a minute.

If you’ve done all the jokes you wanted to do, thank the host and get offstage. This is called “giving the time back to the room.” You will look like a hero.

Record your set on your phone. Do this as much as you can. When I was coming up, I had to buy a little voice recorder and remember to bring it. Now it’s pretty easy to even take video of every set you do.

When it’s your turn, take the microphone out of the stand, and put the stand to your left and a little behind you. When you’re wrapping up, put the microphone stand back in front of you and put the mic in it. This looks professional.

Did you do super well? Probably not. You don’t really have any of the skills you need to do well. Did you do OK? If so, statistically you’ll probably keep going. Feel that rush of endorphins? Enjoy it. One day that will pass, and whether you shine or suck, all sets will leave you feeling empty inside.

Step Three: The Review

Listen to your tape. I know it’s painful. Listen to it. What jokes worked? Mark them on your notes. Can they improve? Can you remove any words and make them work better?

You’ll try a lot of things, a lot of joke forms, but for now, try to write things in this pattern: Setup/punchline. Here’s the setup. It’s the observation or the beginning of the story. Then there’s the punchline, it’s a misdirect or absurd point. Circle the part of your joke that is the setup and the part that is the punchline. Are they in the wrong order? Fix it. Anything that you say after the punchline is a tag. If the joke didn’t work, don’t do the tags.

Now that you’ve done a set, put your funniest joke at the end and your second funniest joke at the start. Now, keep writing jokes.

Step Four: What’s Next, Comedian?

What’s next is you keep writing jokes, you keep going up, you make friends, you get booked on your friend’s shitty shows, you keep writing and going up. After you’ve been onstage a thousand times, you’ll be consistent. You’ll know what you’re doing. You’ll be able to get laughs. People will start asking YOU: How do I do standup comedy?

When people ask, how do you do standup, this is never the answer they want. They want to hear the shortcut, the backdoor, the easy way to get good and be successful!

There is no easy way to do standup comedy. It’s gonna be three years before you’re competent, and maybe another five to get anything resembling “good.”

Is that what you wanted to hear? No? Sorry. Nobody does. I thought I was done as a comic at six years in, but I see now that I’d just begun. I’m starting to get pretty good now, at seventeen years in. If you want to do something that doesn’t take as much time, be a doctor.

GENERALLY GOOD COMEDY ADVICE

Don’t punch down. Don’t make fun of the disabled, the less fortunate, people who don’t have your advantages. There’s plenty of rich, powerful idiots. Make fun of them.

Don’t tell a story about a funny thing your friend did. That’s your friend being funny, not you.

Don’t try to get laughs from what you’re wearing. Everyone seems to go through a phase with this. It’s low key prop comedy.

Don’t worry too much about sounding like your comedy heroes. This happens and you’ll grow out of it.

Don’t just be the yelling person. We’re covered on that.

This time when you’re learning standup comedy is the time to try everything you’re interested in. Guitar comedy? Sure! Observational comedy? Why not? Impressions? Go for it. When you’re not getting paid is the time to do exactly what you want, when you want. It’s no-stakes. Go for it!

50 Worst Jokes

I do this show every year where 50 comics tell our worst jokes- Jokes that are outdated, stupid, or that never worked. Afterwards, we have a dance party! The illustrious Barbara Gray and Sam Varela present 50 worst jokes! Tickets Here.

WORSHIP at Comedy Church with Tuesday Thomas!

comedy church december 9 tuesday thomas

From the deranged mind that brought you FREAKSHOW, comedian and producer Tuesday Thomas reinvents the performance space as COMEDY CHURCH, on alternate Fridays in the space next to 4874 W, Adams blvd!

It’s COMEDY CHURCH: It’s a religion that worships laughter.

Welcome to COMEDY CHURCH: it wants you to have fun.

Sweet COMEDY CHURCH: it will get drunk and confess that it loves you.

At COMEDY CHURCH, we commune, drink, and laugh at dirty jokes.

COMEDY CHURCH will stream on PAGAN TV on ROKU!

Miraculously, the price of your ticket returns to you via tax receipt for a charitable donation under 501 c3, benefitting LGBTQIA and BIPOC youth. It’s a win-win!

The address is for the venue isn’t real- it’s next door and shares a space with a communist bookstore. WHAT AN ADVENTURE!

It’s all organized by Tuesday Thomas, Beautiful Lunatic, Tiktok’s TRANMA-who hurts BECAUSE she cares. She’s been featured on VH1, MTV, E! and BBC’s World of Weird.

If you do nothing else to give and take cheer his Holiday season, come check out Comedy Church! Tickets HERE!

CHANGING THE WORLD

Virginia Jones does comedy. Virginia Jones is your funny friend. Virginia Jones wants to hold your hand and tell you secrets.

Tonight I sat down and bravely made myself a new promo one-sheet. Drink it in, I have a couple celebrity quotes. Thank you for coming on the journey with me.

ALTERCATION COMEDY in AUSTIN!

Altercation Comedy Festival

I’m headed to Austin for my first Altercation Comedy Festival next week, with my friends Jackie Kashian, Mike Weibe, the McCuewans, Kate Willett, Eddie Pepitone, Andy Iwancio, Henry Phillips, and secret headliner Todd Glass! I’m doing a set at a house party on Friday, Oct 21st at 7 (see my Insta for details) and hosting the Henry Phillips show at 9 at Kick Butt Coffee! Yes, it’s just that fancy! Tickets here