I have decided when I start performing live again it will be as a ridiculously average white male comic.
I envy the way they promote each other, and back each other up in times of trouble. Average white men are friends to the end, even if their friend is a pedophile.
They don’t have to be that funny, because they support each other and raise each other up. Bros before hos! Bros before common decency! Bros before, frankly, everything!
Meet Hacky Sack. I will only be writing for, and performing as, an average white male comic in the future. I will take Bert Kreisher’s career. Let me poop into a pizza box.