What’s Good?

Posted Posted in acting, art, comedy, podcast, Uncategorized

Q: What’s Good?

Well, hey, to determine what’s good, we first have to define it, right?

Moral Good

Good can mean morally good: that is, what a society decides is moral. Right now, in this moment – on a Tuesday in March- it is good to sit inside by yourself, and bad to go outside in large groups.  Usually, the opposite is true. It’s good to help others and bad to hoard toilet paper.  

 We think that being a good person is to be of service to others, and to do what is moral, which we pretend is a constant and not something we made up.

500 years ago, it was good to follow church doctrine and bad to question it, as Martin Luther found out.  It was also good to give virgin brides away to strange monarchs, but which someone would probably ask about today. 

 1000 years ago, it was good to burn heretics at the stake, and it was good to be strong.  The whole world was amassing armies and conquering land. China invented paper printed money, which is what power is based on now.  

Looking Good

  A second meaning of good is the aesthetic meaning. This can either mean something that you personally enjoy, or something of superior quality.  The first meaning is subjective, and the second is a societal construct, but we confuse them with each other, and also with the moral meaning of good.  

  To say that something is aesthetically good is to say that based on my background, life experiences, and context, I value it.  My peers, who might have similar background and life experiences, may also value it, which makes me value it more.  

  In The Last Man On Earth and in the Good Place, characters value objects that nobody else appreciates. Phil’s hoard of art in his mansion, or Eleanor’s excitement over a bedpan made famous in a wrestling match: they now have to explain to the people around them what makes these things good, which means they’re not.

  The second meaning of aesthetically good is that something is well-made, as in: is the new Avengers movie any good?  Well, does it have a bunch of characters in shiny outfits and a scary CGI monster? Is Robert Downey Jr. snarky in it? Does Thor not understand something about Earth despite living here kind of a long time and we all laugh at him, even though he’s handsome?  Do the Avengers splinter off and fight and get mad at each other but then they come together and fight the CGI monster and they’re friends in the end? Is there a rock song in it that was expensive to get, but which is played a little too loudly during a very exciting scene? Well, then, that’s what we expect, and it’s good.  

 When you say an Avengers movie is bad- what were your expectations? Did you hope that a character would arrive at a universal truth about human suffering, and that the actor portraying that character would get an important award?  That’s not the yardstick we measure Avengers movies by.

 In performance, to be good is to conform to the current fashion- a hundred years ago, a good singer would sing in a high, reedy voice, and now we like a wide tone and someone who does a lot of vocal switches, which we used to call yodeling.  Good acting in Shakespeare’s time was planting your feet at shoulder width and yelling your lines as loudly as you could.  

  Sometimes we get confused about the two meanings of “good” in art. This is the thought that because you did not personally enjoy something, it’s not good- but in the surfer relativism of The Big Lebowski, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.   Your thoughts on a thing does not really affect its value. If people ever really understand that, Twitter will wither and die.

What’s Good In Fine Art?

 Most art needs context of some sort to be judged- Jackson Pollock paintings are considered good because they were the first really well-known abstract paintings, and because he died only a few years after his best work was made. The value of the paintings his widow was selling to MOMA shot up because, as she pointed out,  there wouldn’t be any more, and that sale created the market for modern art in America, and his peers got rich. If we showed the paintings to an alien or a Maori tribesman, they probably would not consider them good, because they don’t look like anything in particular, but sort of look like lots of things, and why are you putting colors on a fabric square anyway?

     The last episode of the Good Place finds every character trying to achieve their definition of good: Tahani believes that being able to do everything beautifully is good.  Chidi thinks understanding everything is good. Eleanor determines that being good is helping others. 
Jason achieves his definition of good the earliest, as he gets the perfect score in Madden playing as the Jaguars, but reaches yet another level of perfection years later, through achieving inner peace and oneness with nature.

What’s Good?

  I’m a middle-class white woman raised in the South with both religion and MTV, so things I think are good are:

The musty smell of clothing in vintage shops, and the smell of old bookshops.

The moment in a song where the drums lock into syncopation with the guitar, and it sounds like a little machine ticking along.

Black clothing and things that are shiny, because my visual aesthetic was made by 80’s postpunk music videos and has never developed after that.

Cookies n’ cream milkshakes.

Petting a dog who has just dried off from a bath and is very soft, and he’s still unhappy that he got the bath, but being petted afterwards makes it worth the bath, sort of.  

 They’re not universal, except maybe the dog one, but to me, they’re good.

Nobody Listens to Paula Poundstone

Posted Posted in podcast

I’ve been a fan of Paula Poundstone since time immemorial, and it was an honor to be on her podcast.  Did I get to finish a story, or really a thought?  No, I didn’t.  But it was a ton of fun and amazing to be in the room while Paula does her thing.  Listen here:


Jackie Kashian’s Dork Forest!

Posted Posted in acting, art, Bowie, comedy, film, goth, music, podcast

jackie kashian david bowie virginia jones the dork forest labyrinth

I got to do an episode of the incredible Dork Forest Podcast with Jackie Kashian, whom I inundate with Labyrinth trivia. We also try to help her figure out the difference between David Bowie and Billy Idol.  Jackie is a legend and I love her, I love Labyrinth, and I love all of you.

Check it out: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-dork-forest/id210939624?mt=2&i=1000402149479

All My Podcasts

Posted Posted in comedy, podcast

Anyone who knows me might be interested to know I’ve done many podcasts.  More than five, in fact!

My thinking was, if I put all these bastards together, I’ll feel like I’ve done something.  Here’s my list, in some sort of order!

The fantastic Andy Wood and Matt Kirshen have this science based podcast called Probably Science, and they let me be on it one time!

Probably Science

Bryan Cook made up this dirty, funny show where we write erotic fan fiction on the spot, and then he podcasts it so my family can be ashamed of me!  Hooray!

Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction

My second visit to OPB, this time to talk about All Jane No Dick with Stacey Hallal and Whitney Streed!

Think Out Loud

Jim Bruce and Tom Griffin’s show, featuring me and annoyance treater Delilah Smith!

Who’s This Now?

The incredibly famous Put Your Hands Together with Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher from the UCB theatre!

Put Your Hands Together!

International superstar and Last Comic Standing ass-kicker Amy Miller asked me over to talk about the fact that our dads are both dead!

Sorry About Your Dad 

Maximum Fun podcast Lady 2 Lady had me over to shoot the shit and for some reason talk about toilets a lot with Barbara Gray, Tess Barker, and Brandie Posey!

Lady 2 Lady

Cornelius Peter does a podcast called Book Me, Please about books we’ve read, and in some cases, written!  I got to be on it with my friend Matt Kirshen!

Ep. 9: Books by Andy Weir, Tracy Hammond, Douglas Adams & Mark Carwardine are discussed by comedians Matt Kirshen, Virginia Jones, and author Tracy Hammond.

I bullied myself onto this episode of Brock Party with my friend Eliza Rickman!

Brock Party

This is a podcast I got in trouble for, before I convinced my ex husband to stop googling me, and when you move your new wife into the house the day after your old wife leaves, she probably won’t say nice things about you on podcasts!  It’s also from the day after my dog died!

Respect the Danger of Knives

This is a scripted podcast with Sofiya Alexandra and Courtney Kocak!

Voicemails to Self

This is probably my most inscrutable podcast, Doug Driesel Jr’s show:

Obscure Reference!

Me Three, a podcast with Darci “Kittenpants” Ratliff and Lisa Beth “No Pants” Johnson

Me Three!

My most beloved podcast, Pati-oh, Pati-no with Charlene!  I’ve been on it a million times, and here’s one:

Pati-oh, Pati-no!

In 2009, I was on a now long-mothballed podcast called The Ugly Angels!  History!

The Ugly Angels

I was so excited to be on Jackie Kashian’s Dork Forest, thanks to Joe Wilson!

Dork Forest

I was on 5 Top with Joe Wilson, Carol Ann Leifer, Robert Yasumura, and Judith Shelton in 2009 as well!

5 Top


Sorry About Your Dad, by Amy Miller

Posted Posted in comedy, los angeles, podcast, portland

Reblog from sorryaboutyourdad.tumblr.com

Sorry About Your Dad Episode 8: Virginia Jones

“He went out just as he would have wanted. In the parking lot of a casual eatery.”

Comedian Virginia Jones and I have some things in common. We’ve both been found trying to elbow our respective ways to the top of the Portland comedy heap, and we both had largely adult-free childhoods. Yes, there WERE adults, somewhere. Just not at home. I thought I had known the extent of wild adolescent transgressions but then I talked to Virginia and who knew you could huff the freon in your air conditioner? I mean I guess you can huff a lot of things. My family is pretty chubby so maybe nobody was willing to give up that cool cool air during the summer. Just kidding, we never had air conditioning, you dummy!

“Raised” in Texas, she vows never to go back, while her dad stayed Texas loyal until his death last year.

In addition to her dad, we discuss how having good parents can ruin a person, why Russell Brand loves fat women but won’t date them, and what’s worse – a baby or AIDS?

And if you don’t make it to the end, just fast forward because HER LAUGH AT THE END! What a laugh! She’s the best.

Listen Here.

Subscribe in iTunes here.

Follow Virginia on Twitter @badiniadones and read her blog / see her live!

P.S. Amy changed up podcasts to “Who’s Your God?” because after recording her fifth podcast with another comic crying about their dead dad, she asked herself: What is this for?