The Man Who Sold The World On Autoharp:
If you give a goth an autoharp, she’ll ask for a Jazzmaster.
If you give a goth a Jazzmaster, she’ll try to play some Bowie.
I found an autoharp on Glendale boulevard in LA and tuned it and replaced the springs and felts, and then I accompanied myself on this Bowie cover, The Man Who Sold The World. I have probably gone insane. Thank you.
Wondering how to quickly cheer up your goth? Try a bright mask! They’re safer, too!
My mighty gothic cheerleaders!
My friend Chris Christian pointed out that this week it’s been 20 years since we did this daytime sports goth event as part of the PDXINDGOTH bulletin board. Mike King made us SNEERLEADER t-shirts, the dudes played basketball, and I, despite having had my tonsils out the week before, led cheers like:
“DO it and DO it and DO IT FOR ROZZ”
and
“IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN OR ELSE IT GETS THE HOSE AGAIN.”
Anyway, sometimes a person just doesn’t ever change.
I was also really downing my post-surgical codeine syrup, which my doctor’s office was not happy about.
Let’s 
Make A 
Guillermo Del Toro Film!
What will we need?
Smoke wafting through air
Blood wafting through water
Blood wafting through air (ghost blood)
Insects
Ron Perlman
Cisterns
Specialized Metal Containers
Tools with Extensive Wear and Aging
A Fish Guy Who Loves Eggs
Mechanical toys
Intricate Clockwork
Catholic stuff
Gold/Amber colors
Stilts! stilts! stilts!
Robots Made of Clockwork Steampunk Shit
Children/Orphans/Dead Parents
Spanish Civil War
Vampires that are close to being vampires but are not really vampires, like slant rhyme vampires
Hand and Face wounds
Ghosts oh god so many beautiful ghosts
Doug Jones in a rubber suit
Eyes in places they should not be
A Jarred fetus, other mutter museum stuff
A character who was born different, with special abilities, but who would trade it all to be “normal”
Elaborate carved stone labyrinths, waiting for circuits to be connected with blood
At the start of the Covid-19 lockdown, the Getty museum’s twitter account challenged people to recreate works of art at home, with things they had. I did John Singer Sargent’s Portrait of Madame X.
Someone commented that I referenced the original strapless version, which was so sexy that the artist had to add straps. It wasn’t a reference so much as my gown is made of a swimsuit and a bedsheet.
Trivia fact: The original model and I are both named Virginia.
Dollface Productions is a plus size vintage Etsy store of comedy superstar and glamourpuss, Jenny Zigrino. Here’s a dress she got me that not only fits like a dream but is totally and completely my shit. Click on it to go to her Etsy store, which she keeps stocked with great plus size vintage finds!
Lady Bloodmeadow joins Tinder. If you want a goth girlfriend, please watch her video. She really only has one requirement for partners. If you’d like to see more of Bloodmeadow, check out her Youtube playlist here.