Listen To Me

Posted 1 CommentPosted in feminism, women


Dear All;

This is a non-comedy topic.   I’m sorry if that’s weird.  I’m still thinking about the reverberations of #Yesallwomen, and still wondering why men got angry and defensive when women told their stories of being molested, threatened, and abused.

This topic hit close to home when a dear friend woke up to a strange man in her bed last month. She was confused and terrified.  She screamed at him until he retreated, called the cops, is still scared to death, and is moving out of her apartment.

When I tell this story to men, men who I think are decent, men who are dear friends, men I have dated, their reaction is nauseatingly consistent.  They have questions that sound a lot like blame.


Man 1 : Isn’t she on Xanax for anxiety?

A: What the fuck difference does that make?

Man 1: She might have heard him breaking in if she weren’t on medication.


Man 2: Well, hasn’t she worked as a dancer?

A: What the fuck difference does that make?

Man 2:  Well, someone might have fantasies about her.


Man 3: That seems like a lie.  Does she have a history of lying?

A: What the FUCK are you talking about?  My friend is fucked up and scared. What the fuck benefit would she have from making this up?

The only thing  I can think of is that men are so freaked out by the very real terror of being a woman, the very real fear that we carry walking around every day, that their only recourse is to deny it.  Well, that doesn’t really happen.  That wouldn’t happen to someone who didn’t “deserve” it.  That it’s made up.

I don’t know, what other explanation is there?



Glendalia 3!

Posted Posted in comedy, feminism, Gothic, women

We’re building a great show in Glendale, we had a great audience last month but only three comics in the lottery, so 66% of comics got stage time on a bill with Ian Karmel and Jackie Kashian!  The hilarious and wonderful Richard Bain will be co-hosting!

10:30 on Tuesday, June 3 at Complex- 806 E Colorado, Glendale, CA.

This month we are excited to welcome:

Bryan Cook- Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction (Founder), Funny or Die (writer)

Susanna Lee- Last Comic Standing, SF Comedy Competition

Doug Mellard- Last Comic Standing, Moontower Festival

Jesse Case-  Parenthood, Just for Laughs Festival

Matt Kirshen – Craig Ferguson, Jimmy Fallon, LA Weekly’s Top Comics To Watch

Ali Wong – Tonight Show, @midnight, Inside Amy Schumer


Welcome to GLENDALIA!

Posted Posted in comedy, feminism, los angeles, portland, women


Photo Credit: Jonathan Saunders of I Like To Tell Stories

I’m excited to announce that one of my oldest Portland comedy pals, Dax Jordan, and I are bringing a new comedy night to the LA area!  It’s at the super cool Complex at 806 Colorado in Glendale.  We’ll be hosting our amazingly hilarious friends and offering 2 lottery spots for attending comics!  COMPLEX features a full bar and ample seating and  lots of fun for EVERYONE.

First Show’s Roster: Ron Funches (Kroll Show, Conan, Undateable)

Auggie Smith (Living Legend, won SF and Seattle comps the same year)

Robert Buscemi (just a real ray of sunshine and a real pretty peacock)

Heather Thomson (Class, Sass, and Ass)

Richard Bain (An incredibly funny person)

Brock Wilbur (Crime Travel, Guitar Center’s spokesmodel)

Booking requests go to!

Barbara Holm on Feminism

Posted Posted in comedy, feminism, portland, women

Don’t Be a Dick, Anti-Feminists



A few days ago I was hosting an open mic and a very funny nice comedian said, “I don’t understand feminism. Do you feminists just want to BE men?” It’s not the first time I’ve heard feminism equated to butchness, yelling at men for opening doors for us, and growing out our Rapunzel-esque leg hair. Not that there’s anything wrong with not being traditionally feminine, but feminism is not about pretending to be manly; to me it is embracing being womanly and feeling empowered in all of its glorious Georgia O’Keeffe floweriness. Because girls just wanna have fun. And why does toughness imply masculinity? Rubber is tough and I’m never like oh man my bike tires totally have a Y-chromosome.I resent the idea that being a feminist means we’re pretending to be men. I am a feminist because I love women and I want women to feel good about themselves. And feeling good about myself does not mean being manly because my happiness does rely on possessing a penis. I’d have to buy new jeggings and learn how to urinate standing up. It would totally cut into my bathroom Vine watching time.

A few weeks ago, Vice Magazine founder Gavin McInnes said, “I think a lot of women smash through the ‘glass ceiling’… and they see their friends from their small town with 3 kids going to soccer practice and they think, ‘That looks kind of cool, actually.” But being a feminist doesn’t mean that we aren’t allowed to bear soccer player children. There are no overlords that will take athletically inclined offspring from us in the night. But that does sound like a cool plot to a young adult novel with a strong female lead!

Hilarious, clever, beautiful pioneer comedian Wendy Liebman said that her definition of feminism is: “Women helping other women.” And that’s really stuck with me. To me feminists are women who want women to feel empowered. We’re not flannel wearing, angry man haters, unless we want to be. As the amazing and insightful comedian Virginia Jones puts it, “Feminism means we can do whatever the fuck we want and we don’t have to do anything we don’t want to.”

I’m tough and I cry and laugh and am vulnerable and I wear dresses and whilst doing all those things I’m still a feminist. If feminism is the concept that women should feel good about themselves, how could that possibly be a negative thing? Maybe in bizarro world, which is a construct of the DC universe, and regardless of our stance on gender politics, we’re Marvel kids, amiright? Don’t be a dick. Tune in next week to shave my legs for me.

OPB with All Jane No Dick!

Posted Posted in comedy, feminism, portland, women

While in Portland, I was delighted to appear on Think Out Loud with Stacey Hallal and Whitney Streed to promote All Jane No Dick comedy festival.  Here’s the whole article and clip!  The article links back on this blog, so it’s possible that the world will become a hall of mirrors, endlessly referencing itself.


“All Jane” Festival Highlights Women In Comedy

OPB | Oct. 17, 2013 12:30 p.m.

Credit: Carla de Souza Campos (Creative Commons)
Credit: Carla de Souza Campos (Creative Commons)

This weekend, Portland hosts the second annual All Jane No Dick Comedy Festival. The showcase was created to highlight the work of women comics in an industry that is still dominated by men. By some estimates 80 percent of comedy festival performers are men, and the ratio is similarly unbalanced in the writers’ rooms for TV sitcoms and late-night comedy shows.

Stacey Hallal, the creator of All Jane No Dick, says she often sees stand-up bills with eight men and only one woman because there’s a general assumption in the comedy industry that “you can’t put two women in one show.” She says the people booking those showcases assume all women comics are basically the same.

Cameron Esposito, an L.A. comedian who will be at All Jane No Dick this year, performed last year at the festival as well. She says the festival doesn’t set up a dynamic of “men versus women.” The problem, Esposito says, isn’t that men are keeping women out of comedy, “women aren’t doing comedy, because they don’t think they can do it,” because there are relatively few examples. “I think what’s great about this festival is it’s like ‘Here’s all these women doing it.'”