Hold on to your F*cking Hat!

The first week of SNL after the writer's strike featured Tina Fey, and was the funniest episode I can remember. I was gibbering to people like an ass about this girl-centric fake ad, so now I post it here so I can enjoy it forever.

It may turn your baby into a firemonster.

Postscript- This ad is so excellent, it reran on this weekend's Christopher Walken episode!

BOOSHumentary!

I got an email bulletin yesterday alerting me that a documentary was airing in the evening on BBC3 for the best show in the history of television, the Mighty Boosh. I was overcome with a great and great excitment, followed by suicidal sadness, because I knew that even if I had been on a transatlantic plane at that MOMENT, I would still miss it. However, due to the magic of internet theft, a nice person has put it on Youtube for everyone to enjoy. I was particularly excited to hear that Billy Bragg is a Boosh fan, and I'm a Billy Bragg fan, and it's just wheels within wheels!

It's Easy Being Green

In a fitting St. Patrick's day occurrence, I rolled onto my first new "bike box" at SE 7th and Hawthorne today. It's currently a cheery, slightly acid astroturf color, and it's designed to remind cars not to flatten me like a discarded Coke can. I also reached 8,000 miles on my odometer today, almost two years to the day of my 2,000 mile post.
Tomorrow is always an exciting day for a bike commuter, and if the weather's clear, I can report on the number of visible vomits on my regular route.

Ha-Ha History

There is a hipster/record store employee joke that I have heard for several years now. I think it's pretty funny- Michael Ian Black uses it thusly:

Q. What do you get if you play a Duran Duran album backwards?
A. A different, slightly better-sounding Duran Duran album.

I have also heard this joke applied to Interpol and Depeche Mode. Bill Hicks told it about New Kids On The Block. I knew it was old, but I didn't realize how old until I ran across the following quote attributed to Thomas Alva Edison in a funny Blender article about the music industry's biggest blunders:

“I always play jazz records backwards,” he sniffed. “They sound better that way.”

That joke isn't just ancient, it's EIGHTY! Happy Birthday, Joke!

DJ Chico Jones

Chico has amassed a fair collection of deep house and EBM CD's, and he's got them all loaded on his laptop, and he's got five or ten Detroit white label records, and he's ready to offer his services as a DJ and party-maker. He requires a child's highchair and a small bowl of water to perform. He has always been able to bite beats and to scratch. He is very interested in meeting attractive bitches. He is still available for New Year's Eve. He would like to perform at Burning Man next September.

Before you judge me, remember that Portland winters are long, rainy, and grey, and sometimes they make you wonder to yourself, "What if my dog was a rave DJ?"

The Most Powerful Hairspray Known To Man.

I don't know the last time I was just an out-and-out shill for something, but I was pretty excited to pick up a container of Goth Juice last weekend, the new hairstyling product from Lush. It's purple, it's powerful, and it's inspired (along with a companion product called King of the Mods) by the fantastic UK comedy, The Mighty Boosh. Each tub claims it was "Made from the Tears of Robert Smith."
Pete: Robert Smith is *still* not a member of the Smiths. Oddly, none of them were called Smith, which makes them the opposite of the Ramones, who were all named Ramone.

Bridgetown Comedy Festival!

I know, I know- you and me and everyone we know can't wait for the first-ever Bridgetown Comedy Festival, from March 6-8! There is a HUGE roster of West Coast fancy-ass comedians, headlined by the king of the D&D midgets and star of the Oscar-winning food-cooking rat movie, Patton Oswalt- and I believe that there's some time in there for yours truly. Starting March 10th, I will start referring to the weekend as "that time I did a show with Patton Oswalt", which will technically be true.

Update: for anyone who's a fan of the comedy of Virginia Jones specifically, I am scheduled to do time at the following times, dates, and locations:

Thursday, March 6th: Mount Tabor Legacy Lounge, 8:00 PM
Friday, March 7th: Mount Tabor "Big Room", 7:00 PM
Saturday, March 8th: Bar of the Gods, 8:00 PM

UPDATE: Auggie Smith, Andy Wood, and Richard Bain were interviewed for the Willamette Week and they printed it and everything! Suckers.

POSTSCRIPT: It was fantastic. I got to see, meet, and point at so many funny, funny people. I was particularly knocked out by Kyle Kinane and Tig Notaro, whom I met in Andy's basement last year, and James Adomian, Jason Nash, and the lithe and lovely David Cope. Thanks to all who attended, particularly my Gothic Posse.

The hilarious Mr. Oswalt cuddles a puppy onstage. Don't tell Grumpus.

James Adomian's amazing George W. Bush was the surprise hit of the festival.

I like this picture of myself, because I can see me making a weird face, and also see that same face captured on video.

The only other record of me in the festival was a throwaway line about wrist-slitting, recorded in the Mercury blog.